OKnLA

Each day I live and breathe, I'm inching closer to a time when I will no longer understand and will therefore lose the capacity to truly love a teen drama. But I'm not there yet, and I'm (still) searching for something to fill the void Gossip Girl  left when it was revealed that Lonely Boy was the one putting the words in Kristin Bell's mouth. Gossip Girl first aired after an episode of America's Next Top Model.  I remember this because my mother and I used to watch ANTM together in the days before girls started auditioning just so they could meet Tyra. But neither of us could leave the room once Gossip Girl's  pilot began. We were both hooked immediately, and it would be a show we enjoyed together even after I left home for another city hours away, and then another state halfway across the country. GG was corny at times, and it had its pitfalls (how did Chuck Bass start Season 1 by trying to rape little Jenny and end it by kicking off what would become ...

I've seen the Cold War Kids twice now, and my favorite thing about seeing them is they love to let people see them for free in Los Angeles. A free show is always the right idea. This time I got to see them at the iHeart Radio stage in Burbank, California. It's a very cool space, and the staff is super nice. Part of this iHeart Radio streaming party was a line of questioning from iHeart Radio personality. It was cool to hear lead singer Nathan Willett talk about his love for Los Angeles and desire to use their new album, LA Divine,  to set the record straight about the city's perception. He told Billboard the album is "the best version of what [they've] always done," and I agree. There's nothing particularly outstanding about the new album. There's no new, adventurous sound. The freshest thing about LA Divine is the effect the tumultuous year that was 2016 had on the lyrics. For example, Nathan told an amazing story about an art piece in New ...

It's Thursday-night-into-Friday-morning and you know what that means: New music is being posted all over the internet! I am giddy. I have my glass of red wine beside me and I'm ready to pass judgment on everything I hear. The first three new things I listened to were: Kendrick's "HUMBLE," Mary J Blige's "Love Yourself," and whatever the hell Ludacris just did. Let's start with Kendrick.  We got "The Heart Part 4" earlier, so let me mention that I love that Kendrick forces his new listeners to search out preceding Parts by releasing new chapters around each project. It's important to understand how his art has changed. It's like an abridged version of his discography. OK, done with the praise. Because we know KDot is a genius. We know he completely flips it on each project, and it seems the album coming April 7 will continue that trend. But the big question is: Is he after Big Sean or Drake? My opinion: both or neither...

WARNING: ALL OF THE SPOILERS. LIKE, SO MANY SPOILERS. GO SEE THE MOVIE. THAT'S AN ORDER.  In Get Out , the brilliant new Jordan Peele film, black people are used by white people's brains.  That's the shortest explanation, as there are so many levels to the movie. I'm typically not one to see scary movies (I can't even get through Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video), but when I read about this movie's perfect score on Rotten Tomatoes and the raving reviews from critics, I had to go and support this film from a black director with black stars. I'm not a fan of scary movies. They always give me nightmares. Before I saw the film, a coworker assured me that I wouldn't have nightmares after watching  Get Out . He was right and wrong. I didn't have nightmares about monsters lurking in dark corners, but I stayed awake unpacking all of the themes and metaphors of the film. In doing so, a big part of why I wasn't afraid occurred to...

Of course I'm a feminist. Not that that needs explaining, but I absolutely believe in equal treatment and opportunities for both sexes.  But being a feminist doesn't mean I burn bras every Tuesday night. I still adhere to a number of not-so-feminist-friendly traditions. For example, I hate taking the trash out. That's a "man's" job. I take the trash out when I must, but if I can ask Jersey Mike to do it , well that's just 10 times better. Typically, for me, a man's job is any job I don't want to do.  Maybe that's not quite a tradition (more me leaning on societal norms to feed my laziness). But there's one tradition that, growing up, I always thought I'd be fine:  Taking my husband's last name.  My mother kept her maiden name when she married my father. She was born a Shute and felt that shouldn't have to change just because she found a cool guy to spend her life with. Growing up it wasn't confusing for me u...

Today I had a breakdown at work. Like a damn fool.  I had a horrible night, woke up exhausted, and decided to remain unplugged until I got to work. I wanted to take the morning slowly.  I arrived at the office, sat down in my first meeting and heard "I'm just so sad about the news. We're going to write a few things about Prince today, Doriean are you able to do that?"  So I'm sitting there like a dumbass asking "What happened?" Then it hit me. Maybe that wasn't the flu that caused Prince's plane to land suddenly last week. Maybe something was really wrong.  Because he's gone.  So then I'm listening to my assignments, trying to wrap my brain around selecting the best Prince songs (impossible). I'm talking like nothing is happening but tears are streaming. My editor asks if I need a minute and I run to the bathroom and bawl like an infant.  I've been trying to listen to music all day. But nothing compa...

It was hard for me to put this into words. It's hard to explain. If you are an OKnLA reader, you read my last post and you know that I'm exhausted. I'm so tired of trying to tell people who just don't seem to (want to) get it that it's not OK what's happening. You know what I do like? Pudding, specifically the chocolate variety. So I put this thing together in an effort to describe how it feels to hear "White Privilege," how it feels to see Kylie Jenner darken her skin and plump her features, how it feels to hear Iggy Azalea on the radio, how it feels to learn that Mylie Cyrus invented twerking ... Maybe it will make sense to you. Maybe it won't. But it's something I had to do. So here it is. you are a chef.  you love to make things. it's your outlet. it's how you express yourself. one day, you concoct an amazing recipe for chocolate pudding. it's so good. so  very  good.  the kids, they love it! then, health nuts an...

I went on a trip home to Oklahoma last week. I brought Jersey Mike for his first real visit to the state and his first time meeting my friends. It was fantastic and fun. I'd love to tell you all about it. But I can't right now. I can't focus on anything right now.  Upon returning to Los Angeles, I logged onto Twitter and started seeing headlines about the Charleston shooting. I immediately turned it off. At first I felt wrong about doing it. At first I felt like I should face it head-on, get angry, put on my activist hat and get to work.  But I didn't. I couldn't do it.  I'd just gotten home from being surrounded by love. Yes, being back in Oklahoma I heard conversations filled with intolerance. I needed to point out and shut down a few comments that were insensitive and just plain rude. That's something I've gotten used to when visiting home. I'm surrounded by liberals and hippies here in Los Angeles. We are a melting pot of colors,...

This is rather late, but you still care about my opinion. Right?  The Alabama Shakes are one of my favorite bands out right now. They've been around for several years but are currently getting the pickup they've always deserved.  Naturally, I wanted to see them live. But they were only playing Coachella (never going) a show in San Francisco and a show in Las Vegas. Though were were *this* close to heading to Vegas, it never materialized, and I feared I'd miss out on seeing this amazing band until they release another album. Panic set in! So when I noticed a tweet from Amoeba Hollywood with a message promising the chance to see the band perform in Los Angeles with the purchase of an album, I paid attention. Luckily, Jersey Mike didn't have work Tuesday. So he set out to Amoeba first thing in the morning. He was one of the first five in line, and they were only giving tickets to the first 100. The good people at Amoeba Hollywood opened the doors two hours ear...

I was looped into (OK honesty time I looped myself in) to a debate on Facebook about which actor is the best of our time: Tom Hanks or Denzel Washington.  Initially my thought was: no contest. It's Denzel. I don't understand why we're having a debate.  But then the Tom Hanks stans went so hard I had to step back and think about whether or not I was trippin'  But I can assure you I am not. Here are my arguments. 1. Denzel Washington played Malcolm X. Today (May 19th, the date this debate began) is Malcolm's birthday, so triple points for Denzel.  2. Denzel is sexy as hell.  I mean, can I just... Tom, you're a sweetheart but I'm sorry, Denzel's got you on hotness. 3.  Tom and Denzel both have two Oscars. But Denzel was only the second African American actor to win an Oscar for Best Actor in a Leading Role (second to Mr. Sidney Poitier). So if we're talking best of our time, that's a heavy ...

Welp. I've officially fulfilled my dream of becoming a Hollywood starlet. Easy enough, especially considering I never really had that dream in the first place. For those of you who get antsy, go ahead and watch the episode of Head Cases that I'm featured in. If you can hold on to your pantyhose, keep reading to get the full story. Several months ago I went to my first casting call. The request was for ladies with natural hair who could use a little help taking care of their hair. I really just did it to help a friend and to see what the heck a casting call is even like.  A few things made me feel like going was the wrong choice: 1) I made a number of immature decisions the night before the call, which resulted in a debilitating hangover the morning of.  2) I had to drive to Hollywood. On a Saturday.  3) There were tons of girls with varying levels of professionalism and high levels of judgment.  Waiting outside the audition room They...

I've been trying to convince people I was 30 since I turned 22. In my head I just knew that, at 30, I'd have it all figured out. I thought people would finally respect me if I could drop the twenty- in front of my age. Then someone told me that it's not your age that gets you respect, it's how you act. How you carry yourself.  In my 20s I scared myself so many times. A blood transfusion, a broken engagement, moving halfway across the country without a real plan. But through all of those trials I learned so much about myself. I'm not the same little girl I was so many years ago. I appreciate her for who she was. So impressionable, naive, adorable. But I'm very different now.  In my 20s I fell so deep in love, not just once but (at least) twice.  I've learned when to compromise and what I simply won't put up with.  So often I hear people say: "I wish I knew then what I know now." I'm not there yet. If I'd known what I...

Today is my parents' wedding anniversary.  I'm a really bad daughter, so I'm not exactly sure if they've been married 35 or 36 years. Either way that's a long time! That's 35+ years of dealing with another person's funny habits and idiosyncrasies. Of learning how to handle their mood swings, figuring out what things you like to do together and things you'd rather do apart. Learning when to give each other space and when to hold on tight. Figuring out how to keep things "exciting" and "interesting". That's a long time.  Growing up I asked my parents why they got married several times. I got different answers. Here are the top three reasons why my parents got married (from what I remember as a kid):  1) For a ride to work. My parents worked at the same place when they met. Once Mama told me that the reason she married my dad was to get a ride to work. Now, back when we lived in Oklahoma this didn't seem like...

I'm so guilty.  I've always been a bit of a boyfriend shamer. I shame people for having cute relationships and loving their boyfriends a little too much. I shame myself for loving my boyfriend even a little bit. I shame my boyfriend for being amazing.  All of these things are wrong and I am so disgusted with myself. It makes no sense.  I do not trust men. I've had this problem all of my life and I'm not sure where it came from. I have an incredible, loving father and grandfather. I had spectacular male role models growing up and today. But somehow I've been taught to never, ever, under any circumstances trust a man. In an effort to always keep my distance I shame.  I'm constantly team break-up. Did he cheat on you? Break up with him. Did he lie? Break up with him. Oh he got you carnations instead of roses? Break up with him. I honestly consider breaking up with my boyfriend for the tiniest infractions. Sometimes even for what I think he mi...